


Empty Walls

by LyriaBlackFrost



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Anxiety, Confessions, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Light Angst, M/M, Mutual Support
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-07-12
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:42:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25214860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LyriaBlackFrost/pseuds/LyriaBlackFrost
Summary: There were many things about Ryuji that Yuuki appreciated, from how openly he showed and accepted affection, to how spontaneously he expressed himself—things Yuuki doubted he could do himself.Wishing to change how closed and hesitant he is, especially when it comes to proximity, Yuuki asks for Ryuji’s help, receiving support in more ways than he expected.
Relationships: Mishima Yuuki/Sakamoto Ryuji
Comments: 6
Kudos: 56





	Empty Walls

**Author's Note:**

> I dedicate this to Old, who has been waiting for decades for me to finish this fic. Thanks for always helping me sort out my ideas, and your patience with how long I take to write them. <3
> 
> I hope you like it!

Yuuki first met Ryuji during their first day of high school. He was a nervous wreck at the time, expecting the worst after the living nightmare that middle school had been to him. He was now embarrassed to think that, when Ryuji first talked to him, he believed that he was about to be bullied again. However, it didn’t take more than a few minutes for his fears to dissipate, and, as the days went by, Yuuki allowed himself to relax when he was close to Ryuji, soon coming to think of him as a friend.

He wasn’t used to having friends, but Ryuji’s company was always pleasant. He was loud and spontaneous, pretty much the opposite from Yuuki himself; still, their conversations seemed to flow without a problem. At first, a few common interests brought them closer, but, with time, they were already recommending comics and games to each other, then spending time together after class, and then—a few months later—Yuuki finally made the first of his many visits to Ryuji’s home.

“Your bedroom is so _you,”_ he commented as soon as he stepped inside.

Ryuji looked at him, slightly furrowing his brow.

“You mean like, a mess?”

“No!” Yuuki added quickly with a brief chuckle. “I mean… I don’t know how to explain it. It just has this _Ryuji Sakamoto_ feel to it.”

“I really don’t know what you mean by that…”

Yuuki sat on the bed, a smile taking his lips as he looked around.

“I feel comfortable here,” he said.

“Well, that’s a good thing.”

Saying that, Ryuji sat beside him, placing an arm around Yuuki’s shoulders. It didn’t take long for Yuuki to notice that detail about Ryuji: he was very affectionate with his friends, and tended to show it with gestures like that one. Unfortunately, his body didn’t react well to that kind of proximity, tensing up by pure instinct. Noticing it, Ryuji moved away.

“My bad,” he said. “I keep doin’ this without thinkin’.”

“No, it’s fine!” answered Yuuki. “I’m just not used to it.”

For a moment, Yuuki feared his reaction would make things awkward between them. However, Ryuji didn’t make a big deal out of it, turning on the TV and grabbing the video game controllers, giving one to Yuuki.

“Anythin’ you wanna play?” he asked.

Yuuki had to make an effort not to let a relieved sigh escape his lips before he gave Ryuji his answer.

* * *

He could tell that, after that day, Ryuji started to pay more attention to his own actions, stopping himself whenever he came close to touching Yuuki. As much as he appreciated his concern, however, Yuuki also felt slightly guilty about it. It was strange, but, at the same time that he disliked being touched, he also hoped Ryuji would end up doing it again by accident. He couldn’t understand how he actually felt about it, and chose to, instead, keep his feelings locked inside his chest.

Besides, those following months gave him many other things to worry about. Kamoshida, Ryuji’s surgery, and the rumors people spread about his friend—and, since he was always with Ryuji, about himself as well. It wasn’t a pleasant year, and if it wasn’t for Ryuji’s presence, Yuuki didn’t know if he would be able to deal with all of those things.

But then, their second year came, changing Yuuki’s life in a matter of weeks. The Phantom Thieves, Kamoshida’s arrest, his work on the phan-site… his new _friends._ Everything happened too fast, to the point Yuuki felt like the one single thing that didn’t change was his relationship with Ryuji. As excited as Yuuki was with his small role among the Phantom Thieves, the afternoons he spent with Ryuji, doing nothing but chat and play games, were comforting, like a reminder that, despite everything, he was still a teenager boy—the two of them were.

When they finally managed to beat that level after what felt like a thousand tries, Ryuji let go of his controller, raising both arms above his head, in a victorious gesture.

“Holy shit, we finally did it!” He let out a loud, pleased laugh, placing his arm around Yuuki’s shoulders, pulling him close. “Nice one, Yuuki!”

The touch made him tense up. Ryuji immediately moved his arm away, a shadow of guilt covering his face. It caused a sharp pain in Yuuki’s heart: he hadn’t realized until that moment how much he still hoped Ryuji would touch him like that again, but his reaction ruined everything, as it always did.

“Sorry,” said Ryuji, “I didn’t mean to…”

“Wait! Don’t…”

Yuuki’s words failed him, so he reached for Ryuji’s hand, holding it with both of his. _What did he want to say?_ And, more important than that: _how did that make him feel?_ Carefully, he brought Ryuji’s hand to his shoulder, holding it in place with his own. It still made him nervous, but…

“I don’t dislike this,” he murmured.

Ryuji observed him for a while, uncertain.

“It’s okay if you do,” he said, moving his hand away once again. “You don’t need to endure it for my sake, okay?”

“I’m not,” insisted Yuuki. “I really don’t dislike it. It’s just that…” He looked away, lowering his voice. “Until now, people only touched me when they wanted to hurt me. I just react to it without thinking.”

His feelings only made sense when he said those words aloud, and understanding the reason behind it all, while painful, still brought him some relief. Ryuji didn’t say anything else for a long while, his gaze low, his mind seeming distant. Yuuki feared his words had made him uncomfortable, and was already thinking of a way to apologize when Ryuji finally spoke again.

“Do these people still hurt you?”

He wasn’t expecting that question, and needed a second to find the words.

“Ah, no… It was mostly during middle school…” He made a brief pause. “And then Kamoshida.”

“How about your parents?”

“They don’t hit me! They usually just yell at me, and take away the things I like as a punishment.”

Ryuji just looked at him, without a word, for a long while. The silence made Yuuki feel restless.

“Did you ever tell them about what happened in middle school?” asked Ryuji.

“I… tried,” admitted Yuuki. “But they just said I should apologize.”

“For what?”

“For causing trouble, and making them mad at me. They said the same thing about Kamoshida… That I should be thankful someone like him was willing to teach me.”

His words made Ryuji widen his eyes, his expression quickly being taken by anger.

“Are you serious?” he asked in a slightly loud voice.

Yuuki averted his gaze, hugging his own arms.

“They didn’t really hear me until the end…” he admitted. “And I was too embarrassed of myself to try again later.”

“You had nothin’ to be embarrassed about! You needed help!”

Yuuki risked a brief glance at Ryuji. As much as he didn’t like to see him upset like that, it was also a relief to know that he cared enough to get angry because of him. He offered his friend a smile, shaking his head.

“It’s fine,” he said. “It’s over now, anyway.”

Ryuji didn’t answer, and soon that restlessness started to fill Yuuki’s chest again.

“I’m sorry for talking about this,” he muttered.

“Don’t apologize to me,” answered Ryuji. “I just… I just wish I could’ve done more for you.”

It was Yuuki’s turn to stay silent. Whenever Ryuji was around while Kamoshida made fun of Yuuki, or hit him with the ball by “accident”, he would argue with that man in his defense, or find an excuse to drag Yuuki away from him. It always made Yuuki’s chest ache to think that those things probably encouraged Kamoshida to hurt Ryuji later. As much as Ryuji said it hadn’t been his fault, Yuuki still felt a sharp guilt whenever he noticed Ryuji’s slight limping, or his pained expression after forcing his leg a little too much.

“Don’t say that,” asked Yuuki in a low voice. “You always did everything you could for me… And I would hate it if you got hurt again, especially if it was for my sake.”

Ryuji nodded, but his gaze was slightly distant, as if his mind was somewhere else. He let out a brief sigh, looking at Yuuki.

“If anythin’ like this happens again, tell me, okay?”

Yuuki hesitated for a moment, but ended up nodding.

“Okay.”

Neither of them spoke for the following minute, and it brought those previous thoughts back to Yuuki’s mind. After Ryuji’s surgery, Yuuki wondered many times if his friend resented him for what had happened; however, when he tried to talk about it with Ryuji, he looked nothing but confused by the question. _“I defended you ‘cause you’re my friend… Why would I be mad at you now?”_ he had said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. At that time, Yuuki hoped Ryuji would just blame him instead… It would be much easier to simply apologize than to deal with all those confusing and painful feelings his kindness caused him.

But now, many months later, it was reassuring to know there was someone who cared so much about him—in a way he had never thought possible before high school.

“Hey…” Ryuji’s low voice finally broke the silence. “You know I’d never hurt you, right?”

His hesitant words surprised Yuuki.

“Yes,” he said.

“That’s good.”

Ryuji let out a brief, relieved sigh.

“Sorry…” he said. “I’ll pay more attention to what I do from now on.”

It took Yuuki a second to understand what he meant.

“But it’s not bad when you do it,” insisted Yuuki. “I even think I could get used to it. No, I mean…” He made a pause, looking into Ryuji’s eyes. “I want to get used to it.”

“You don’t have to.”

“I want to!” He made a brief pause, lowering his tone as he continued. “So… If you don’t mind it, then…”

He didn’t want to sound _that_ nervous. Ryuji observed him, seeming as restless as himself with the situation.

“Won’t it be bad for you?”

Yuuki shook his head.

“You sure?” insisted Ryuji.

“Yes.”

Ryuji turned his body to Yuuki, waiting a few seconds before raising his hand, as if giving him time to change his mind. Yuuki closed his eyes, his body tensing up as he felt Ryuji’s fingertips gently brush his cheek.

“Just tell me if it’s too much,” whispered Ryuji.

“It’s okay.”

His hand slowly went down Yuuki’s face, until it was cupping his chin. He could now feel Ryuji’s entire palm against his skin, and the first thing on his mind was how surprisingly soft they felt. Little by little, he started to relax under that touch.

“Your hand is warm,” he said.

“Is it good?”

“It is.”

Ryuji moved his hand away from Yuuki’s face for just a moment, to, instead, touch his hair.

“Your hair is so soft,” he said.

“Is it?”

“Yeah.”

A smile took Yuuki’s lips as he heard Ryuji’s small, pleased laugh. It was a strange feeling: part of him wanted to relax and enjoy those touches, but, at the same time, his heart wouldn’t calm down. He opened his eyes, meeting Ryuji’s gaze on him. Something about it made his body tense up again, and, immediately, Ryuji moved away.

“Too much?” he asked, concerned.

Yuuki shook his head.

“I’m fine.”

But Ryuji didn’t touch him again, offering him a reassuring smile.

“There’s no need to push yourself,” he said. “We can do it little by little, until you get used to it.”

Part of Yuuki wanted to protest, but he knew Ryuji was right—as much as he disliked that part of himself, it would be impossible to change it in a single day. He nodded, lowering his gaze, slightly embarrassed by how complicated he was.

“Wanna go back to the game?” asked Ryuji.

His casual tone was comforting. Yuuki looked at him, nodding a second time.

“Sure.”

Neither of them mentioned it again for the rest of the day, to which Yuuki was thankful. They stopped playing when the sky started to get darker, and, as usual, Yuuki wished he could stay there a little longer. However, he didn’t want to have an argument with his parents, who were very strict about his curfew.

“It’s kinda cold…” observed Ryuji as soon as he opened the entrance door. “Wanna borrow a jacket?”

“There’s no need,” answered Yuuki. “It’s just two stops away.”

“Yeah, but I don’t want you to freeze for two stops.” Without giving Yuuki a chance to respond, Ryuji walked back to his bedroom. “Just a minute.”

He came back an instant later, offering Yuuki one of his jackets.

“Here,” he said. “You can just give it back tomorrow.”

Yuuki wore it, unable to hold back a small giggle as he looked at himself.

“It’s too big for me,” he said.

“Yeah…” agreed Ryuji with an amused smile. “Makes you look pretty tiny.”

That comment made Yuuki pout at him.

“Don’t make fun of my height!”

“I’m not!” answered Ryuji. “You look really…”

He interrupted himself, looking away from Yuuki. His smile slowly gave place to a low, nervous chuckle.

“It looks good on you,” he said, briefly gesturing in Yuuki’s direction.

“Does it?”

Yuuki looked again at himself, and had to admit that, despite it looking more like an overall coat, he didn’t dislike it—probably because of how much he associated it to Ryuji, as well as his faint, but familiar smell on the fabric. It made him feel comfortable, and not only because of how soft and warm it was.

“Ryuji…” he said before he could stop himself. “Before we go, can I ask you one last thing?”

“What is it?”

He needed a moment to gather his courage, before speaking in a low voice.

“Can you hug me?”

Ryuji looked at him for a while. Then, without a word, he placed his arms around Yuuki’s body, pulling him close to his chest. Yuuki thought something like that would make him feel trapped and anxious, but Ryuji held him in such a caring manner that he felt nothing but safe.

It was enough to make him feel like crying.

* * *

Yuuki’s parents went on a brief trip that weekend, to go to the wedding of a relative in another town. He used that chance to invite Ryuji to visit his house, aware that, if his parents were around, they would do everything they could to—indirectly—make Ryuji feel unwelcome. He had seen how they ruined some of his older sister’s “bad” friendships in the past, and knew they wouldn’t hesitate to do the same with him, while saying it was _for his own sake._ He valued his relationship with Ryuji too much to take that risk.

But, with the house just for himself, he was finally able to make his way home with Ryuji after class; and, while he knew it wasn’t anything to get too excited about, he still was, barely containing a wide smile as they entered his bedroom.

“I know it’s pretty boring compared to yours,” commented Yuuki.

Ryuji looked around, at those plain white walls, dark wood furniture, and matching, beige and white sheets and covers. The only trace of personality in it was Yuuki’s video game, and a few books on his shelf.

“I’m surprised there ain’t a Sailor Moon poster anywhere,” commented Ryuji in a playful tone, after a while.

His words made Yuuki show an amused grin.

“Nowhere you can see, at least.”

Ryuji looked at him, curious.

“I’ll show you my secret sanctuary,” added Yuuki.

He faced his closet, opening its doors, moving the clothes out of the way like a curtain, to reveal what seemed like a small altar, with three small posters on the back, five artbooks piled over each other, and, above them, four figures, a few keychains, and half a dozen pins of his favorite game and anime characters. He gestured for Ryuji to approach and take a look.

“I don’t have much, but I like how it looks,” he said.

Ryuji observed his belongings for a while, paying special attention to his few figures. Yuuki couldn’t help but ramble about how he got each of those things, happy to finally be able to share it with someone.

“Why do you keep them hidden, though?” asked Ryuji after a while. “They’d look nice on your shelf.”

The question felt like a bucket of cold water had been dropped over his head.

“I can’t do that,” he said.

“Why not?” Before he could answer, Ryuji added: “‘Cause of your parents?”

Yuuki let out a small sigh before nodding.

“They said many times that I should stop playing games and reading manga…” he explained. “I know they’d be mad at me if they saw these things… Maybe they would even take them away from me. So, I keep them here.”

Ryuji furrowed his brow at that answer.

“Why would they get mad about somethin’ like this?”

“Well, you know…” Yuuki absentmindedly reached for one of his figures, holding it as he thought of the answer. “They don’t think someone my age should still like these things… especially the girly ones. If I ever put anything close to a magic girl over my desk, they would probably burn it.”

“But it’s _your_ bedroom,” said Ryuji.

“I know… But I’m _their_ son.”

Yuuki placed the figure back in place, while Ryuji followed his movements with his gaze.

“You don’t belong to them,” said Ryuji.

“Yes, but I live here.” Yuuki carefully aligned the pins side by side, in front of the figures. “We already had many fights over things like this, so… I just think it’s better if I don’t go against them.”

Ryuji didn’t say anything for a while.

“You know that’s really unfair, right?”

Yuuki shook his head, showing him a small smile.

“I’m fine with it,” he said.

“If you say so.”

Once again, Ryuji stayed quiet for a moment, seeming lost in thought. Yuuki tried to think of something else to say to lighten the mood, but nothing came to his mind, so he carefully covered his _sanctuary_ with that curtain of clothes, closing the door.

“Hey…” Ryuji’s voice called his attention. “Can I hug you?”

Yuuki looked at him, slightly surprised.

“Right now?” he asked.

“Is it bad?”

Yuuki shook his head. Usually, he was the one who requested things like that—in fact, that was the first time Ryuji ever did it.

“No,” he said, “it’s fine.”

Ryuji moved closer, carefully placing his arms around Yuuki, who leaned against his chest. He had gotten more used to those things during the past few months, enough to hardly react in a bad way when Ryuji touched him. Still, for Ryuji to ask something like that all of a sudden…

“You’re angry, aren’t you?”

“A little…” admitted Ryuji.

Yuuki had to contain a small laugh at his upset tone.

“I’m fine, though,” he assured. “I have to be the perfect son when I’m here, but…” He smiled against Ryuji’s chest. “I feel like I can be myself when I’m with you.”

“Good…” answered Ryuji. “I’d get mad at you if you weren’t.”

“Don’t be.”

Ryuji’s tightened his embrace a little, probably without even noticing it. It crossed Yuuki’s mind that, if it was anyone else holding him like that, he would hate it. But, since it was Ryuji…

“I like your hugs,” he said.

“Glad you do.”

This time, Ryuji’s voice sounded softer. Despite all of his insecurities, Yuuki could tell that Ryuji truly cared about him, in a way that he found difficult to comprehend, but also difficult to doubt.

“You should do it more without me asking,” he said.

“I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable.”

Yuuki moved slightly away, staring at him with a furrowed brow.

“But I just told you to do it.”

Something in his words made Ryuji laugh—probably his frustrated tone. He placed a hand on Yuuki’s head, gently ruffling his hair.

“Okay, then,” he said. “Prepare yourself for a lot of hugs from now on.”

He said that in a playful manner, but Yuuki hoped he meant it.

* * *

Just a few days later, Ryuji invited Yuuki to his house again. The Phantom Thieves had already changed the hearts of every target Yuuki found for them, and he still didn’t have any new leads, which meant they could take a few days for themselves without feeling guilty about it.

As soon as they arrived at Ryuji’s home, Ryuji faced him, barely able to contain a grin.

“So…” His smile widened as he spoke. “Now that we’re here, I’ve got somethin’ for you.”

Those words caught Yuuki by surprise, making him stare at Ryuji, curious.

“What is it?”

“It’ll be easier to show you,” answered Ryuji. “Come, it’s in my bedroom.”

Yuuki followed him, wondering what could it be. As soon as they stepped inside, he noticed one of the walls, as well as the shelves on it—previously covered by posters, figures, and old trophies—were now completely empty. Ryuji gesticulated towards that now strangely dull part of his bedroom with an excited face.

“Here,” he said. “It’s for you.”

Those words made Yuuki raise his eyebrow.

“Your wall…?” he asked.

“No,” corrected Ryuji. “From now on, this is _your_ wall.”

Yuuki stared at him, confused, wondering if that was a joke that went over his head. Noticing his lost expression, Ryuji proceeded.

“Since you can’t put stuff you like in your room, I thought you could do it here, instead,” he explained. “I know it ain’t the same thing, but… I thought it’d be better than keeping it all in the back of your closet.”

Slowly, that strange gift started to make more sense in Yuuki’s mind. He widened his eyes at Ryuji.

“You mean… I can put my posters on it?” he asked.

“Yeah,” Ryuji nodded. “And you can use the shelves for your figures, an’ everythin’ else.”

“Are you sure…?”

“‘Course I am.”

Yuuki looked from the wall to the empty shelves, and then back at Ryuji.

“But… How about your things?” he asked.

“I still got three walls and a bunch of places for my stuff.” Ryuji shrugged. “It really ain’t a problem, so don’t worry about it. By the way…”

He approached his closet, taking what seemed like a roll of paper from it, offering it to Yuuki.

“I got you your first poster yesterday.”

Without thinking twice, Yuuki unrolled that poster, a smile quickly taking his face as he looked at the image. He shouldn’t be surprised to see it was of Sailor Moon, that silly and cheesy thing he loved so much since his childhood. A _girly_ thing, according to his parents, but still dear to him.

“Did you like it?” asked Ryuji.

“Yes.” He had to make an effort not to hug the poster against his chest. “I love it.”

“Go ahead, then.” Ryuji gestured toward the wall. “Do the honors.”

Yuuki nodded, taking some time to find the ideal place for it as Ryuji took a roll of duct tape from his drawer.

“Is it right?” asked Yuuki after a while.

“Just a little…” Ryuji approached him, then lowered Yuuki’s right arm just a bit, taking a step back. “Now it looks good!”

“Hold it here for me,” asked Yuuki.

Ryuji did as he said, keeping the poster in place while Yuuki placed the tape on its borders. As soon as he was finished, the two of them moved away, looking at it.

“That’s a good start,” said Ryuji.

Yuuki looked at him, still lost between excitement and hesitation.

“Can I really put more things here?” he asked.

“I told you, didn’t I?” answered Ryuji, gently ruffling his hair. “This is _your_ wall now. You can do whatever you want with it.”

With that, his hesitation finally subsided, allowing him to focus on the things he wanted to put there next. Starting with the ones he already had, and then those he wanted to buy but hadn’t yet, either because he was afraid of his parents finding it, or because he didn’t have enough room in his closet for it.

“I’ll bring my things here tomorrow,” he said. “Will you help me put the other posters on?”

“Sure.”

“I can’t wait… I didn’t know it could be this exciting!”

Yuuki giggled to himself, then looked at Ryuji, who watched him with a fond smile on his face. Not for the first time, Yuuki caught himself thinking of how beautiful his smile was—and how much he loved to see it.

“Thank you,” said Yuuki.

“It’s nothing,” answered Ryuji, placing an arm around his shoulders. “Just glad to see you happy like this.”

The touch made his heart jump, but not in a bad way. More often than not, their proximity had that effect on him, making him feel at peace, and, at the same time, unable to fully relax, as if anticipating—hoping for—something more. Something he wanted from Ryuji, and no one else.

_It was love, wasn’t it?_ Part of him already knew, and still, it only became clear in his mind at that very moment.

* * *

As he said, Yuuki brought the things from his closet to Ryuji’s bedroom on the following day. With Ryuji’s help, he arranged the posters on the wall, then spent some time placing the other things on the shelves.

“Now, there’s only one thing left,” he said. “I saved the most important one for last.”

Ryuji looked at him with an interested smile.

“And what’s so important?” he asked.

“Just a moment…” answered Yuuki. “I placed it inside my notebook to protect it. Ah, here it is!”

Yuuki opened his notebook, taking from it a printed picture of the two of them—Ryuji with his arm around his neck, both carrying wide, happy smiles. It wasn’t difficult for Yuuki to choose one picture, since that was, by far, his favorite one—because of how close they looked, and, of course, Ryuji’s bright and beautiful smile. Ryuji got closer to him, staring at that picture over Yuuki’s shoulder.

“This is…?”

His slightly confused voice made Yuuki glance at him.

“You took it when we went to the amusement park together, remember?” he asked.

“Yeah… But why did you bring it?”

“Because I want to place it on my wall.”

For some reason, Ryuji seemed surprised to hear that.

“You sure you wanna put somethin’ like that here?” he asked.

Yuuki furrowed his brow at that silly question.

“Of course I want to!” he said. “This is a place for the things that are special to me!”

He turned to the wall, a smile taking his face as he found the perfect place.

“I’ll put it in the middle.”

Saying that, he grabbed the duct tape, carefully putting it in place. It was smaller than his posters, but being right in the center of the wall made it stand out more than everything else, just like Yuuki hoped it would.

“That’s a… really important place, ain’t it…?” murmured Ryuji.

“It is, the place of honor!” Yuuki giggled, taking a step back to admire his wall. “We should take more pictures together… I don’t want this to be the only one.”

“Yeah, sure… Whenever you like.”

“How about we take one now?” He turned to face Ryuji, who had his gaze on the floor and a hand covering his mouth. The sight worried Yuuki. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” answered Ryuji, forcing a smile.

His reaction made Yuuki rethink his actions. He had been so excited about it that he didn’t stop to think that, maybe, he was doing something weird.

“Does the picture bother you?” he asked. “I can take it out if—”

“No!” said Ryuji. “Actually, it makes me really happy.”

Yuuki observed Ryuji for a while, and his flustered expression made a thought cross his mind.

“Ryuji…” he started to say. “You know you’re really important to me, don’t you?”

Ryuji didn’t answer immediately, taking a moment to think about it.

“I think I only realized it now,” he admitted in a low voice.

His words made Yuuki’s chest tighten.

“Because I never really said it to you before, right?” he murmured.

Yuuki took a deep breath, reaching for Ryuji’s hand, carefully holding his wrist. Ryuji looked at him, meeting his gaze.

“So, I’ll do it now,” he proceeded. “You’re very important to me. Actually, you’re the most important person in my life.”

“I…” Ryuji seemed to struggle with the words for a while, then shook his head. “Shit, I don’t even know what to say… You’re really important to me too. I can’t even begin to tell you how much. Damn, I…”

He opened his mouth, but couldn’t say anything else. Something in his expression made those feelings of restlessness take Yuuki once again. Before he could stop himself, he was speaking again, in a low, calm voice that didn’t match the hasty beating of his heart.

“Listen, Ryuji…” he took a deep breath. “You gave me so much already. You’re the first true friend I’ve ever had… You helped me break out of my shell, and try to get close to other people. You even gave me a place to express who I am. I don’t think you realize how much you’ve done for me…”

He stopped for a moment, aware that he couldn’t go back anymore, but still scared of saying what he wanted to.

“Is it too selfish that I still want more?”

Ryuji didn’t answer immediately. Yuuki lowered his gaze, his heart beating fast enough to hurt, both anticipation and fear quickly filling his chest. After a few seconds of anxious silence, Ryuji moved closer to him, carefully caressing Yuuki’s cheek with his fingers.

“No…,” he said. “It ain’t selfish at all.”

The answer made Yuuki raise his eyes again.

“Really?”

“Yeah…” Ryuji smiled. “Really.”

Yuuki returned the smile, and Ryuji leaned forward, his forehead touching Yuuki’s. It was enough to make his anxiety melt, giving place to a sweet and intense euphoria, strong enough to overcome all of his thoughts and senses. They stayed like that for a moment, their gazes meeting before Yuuki closed his eyes. The anticipation made those few instants feel like an eternity, until Ryuji finally kissed him.

He could barely believe it was truly happening. The soft sensation of their lips touching, and the feeling of Ryuji’s hands on his waist while Yuuki caressed the side of his neck. It was almost too much, but he liked it. He truly, truly liked it. When Ryuji finally broke the kiss, Yuuki had to control himself not to lean forward, just so he could have a little more of it.

“I wish I could place this on my wall too,” he murmured.

Saying it aloud made him realize how silly it sounded. Ryuji giggled, and Yuuki averted his gaze, angry at himself.

“We can’t do that…” said Ryuji. “But we can kiss again whenever you want to.”

Yuuki looked at him with a slight pout.

“I want it now,” he murmured.

“How impatient…”

Despite his playful tone, Ryuji carefully held Yuuki’s chin, tilting his head up so he could kiss him again. Yuuki never thought he would feel safe enough in someone’s arms to simply relax and think about nothing, and yet, there he was, doing exactly that.

When he thought about it, it was amazing how much he had changed since the two of them first met.

* * *

The shelves had a considerable number of comics and figures, both old and new. As for the wall itself, a big part of its surface was already covered in posters, and a few other things, like movie tickets, song lyrics, and stickers.

And, of course, there were a lot of pictures. Many of them of him with Ryuji, taken during what was now an entire year since he placed the first one there. Not only of the two of them, but also many others with their friends and other people important to him, like his sister and her girlfriend. Among them was one of him standing between Ryuji and his mom, being hugged by them from both sides. It was funny to think about it, but the more he spent time in Ryuji’s home, the more he felt that he was part of that family—much more than he ever felt living with his own parents.

He took a picture of it, observing the result with a fond expression. He did that from time to time, for those moments when he needed something to make him smile.

“It grew a lot, didn’t it?” he said.

“Sure did,” agreed Ryuji. “Soon it’ll be takin’ the ceiling too.”

“Don’t give me ideas.”

“You can have it…” Ryuji shrugged, a playful grin on his lips. “If you can reach it without my help.”

Yuuki pouted at those words.

“That’s mean,” he said.

Ryuji hugged his waist, placing a kiss on the side of his head. It was enough for Yuuki’s pout to turn into a smile. He reached for the side of Ryuji’s neck, gently pulling him down, kissing his cheek. He turned his gaze back to that wall, feeling warm inside—it was proof that he finally had a place where he belonged, and he couldn’t be happier about it.

“It feels like me, doesn’t it?” he asked, looking at that wall once again.

“Yep,” answered Ryuji. “Tiny nerd energy.”

“Don’t say that!”

His protest sounded so half-hearted that not even himself could take it seriously. Ryuji laughed, placing many soft kisses all over his face, until Yuuki was nothing but giggles. He took the first chance he could to face Ryuji, ready to repay him in that same way.

**Author's Note:**

> Count the times Yuuki almost killed Ryuji by accident with his cuteness. :')
> 
> Thanks for reading, I hope you liked it!


End file.
